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November 22, 2005

My new site finally goes Live

Que the Fanfare peeeeerrrrrlease! Do-do-dooo-do-do-do-doooooo

It is with much a do about nothing that I can officially announce that the new website Ive been working on the for the last month or so has finally gone live.

Called "living with Chronic Pain" it is an interactive patient support site very similar to the ostomy site but obviously revolving around Chronic pain.

The URL of the site is: http://www.chronicpainsupport.info/ and is fully PHP Powered - meaning users can add content to the site using WYSIWYG editors (mini Word Processor text boxes) as well as having user accounts and more.

Features of Chronicpainsupport.info include:

• Detailed information on major pain-related conditions such as Neuropathic pain, Neuralgia, Fibromyalgia and more!
• Fully categorised Message Board
• 24/7 Chat Room with Weekly Meeting
• FREE User Journals – use it to monitor your pain score, or to just keep track of the things you’ve done today!
• User reviews – Post your review on anything pain related. Be it a TV program, a book or a website etc.
• Live Pain News Feeds – all the latest news direct from the major pain organisations
• User Surveys/Polls – have your vote on the important pain issues of the day!
• Comprehensive Pain-related bookstore in association with Amazon.co.uk and .com

The site is 100% free, however to be able to access all of the website and to be able to post on the message board a FREE username account is required, but it’s a dead simple process to sign up.

You are the first people that I’ve announced the site with as I wanted you all to be the first to know about it. Without all your support here this site would never have grown to the size it has, and therefore there would’ve been no reason for to think about creating a site for one of the other main “taboo” or rather “swept under the mat” health issues today that isn’t as fully supported on the net as it should be, Chronic Pain.

Everyone here is welcome to have a look at the site, register and have a play, use the journals, read the news, post your own pain news, visit the boards, and of course visit the chat room once it goes live next month!

I hope you all enjoy this latest addition to the ostomysupport.info family. I guess that this new site makes us a “network” now.

Posted by Jason at 09:49 AM | Comments (4)

November 19, 2005

Not been good

The more keen eyed of you will have noticed that Ive not posted anything on here for a while - well over a week in fact. The truth is that Ive not been that good, the pain has returned with a vengeance and im gettin very little restbite from it during the day. The last week or so has been very hard indeed, the old "red hot poker" pain is the one im having problems with, and its really really really wearing me down.


But I tell you what is wearing me down more than this. People complaining about the website. Yep, its still going on. Principally revolving around the chat room. I may not have the complaints given directly to me by the individuals who are complaining but it gets passed on to me nevertheless so that I am aware of it and up to speed with whats happening in there. After the insults of being all but made out to be a devil-worshipper for hosting a halloween themed party on Oct 31st, Ive now received a complaint about the bot's comment on sex, that users can trigger with the !sex command. It's a harmless bit of fun. But its not apparently. Its unsuitable for the channel apparently and takes your mind to "places it shouldnt be".

I am sick to death of having to justify everything I do on this website and its services. I am sorry if it seems I am being a the worlds biggest hypocrite by always complaining about the complainers, because I openly acknowledge I am. But I am just frustrated and totally tired of every little thing being picked apart and people expecting things to be done at their say-so.

Maybe Ive tried too hard in the past to try and please everyone, I dont know. It just seems like people are not prepared to compromise in this world anymore, to be prepared to put up with one or two little things they dont like for the sake of the majority of the others.

The depression is very bad again. Worst now though after reading that mail this morning about the chat room complaint. I saw the councellor this week for my 3 - 6 month review, and what a startling waste of everyones time it was too. After telling her I was suicidal two months ago, that I dont feel the tablets are working anymore and desperately need something to happen to get over this problem, all I got given was a 3 month review appointment and a promise that they'd send out a letter to a depression support group. This is the same group that theyve been sending letters to for three years, and Im STILL waiting for the first appointment from then. I wont hold my breath about getting one this time either.

The other night I just cried and cried in bed with my head under the pillow. So frustrated at this situation. Im totally in the hands of people to whom I am nothing but a patient number and a wheel nut on their next new BMW. Ive been trying so hard in the chat room to seem happy and OK and with it, and doing well on the whole, but to be honest I am not. Life fucking sucks, and I hate it. If it werent for my parents I would not be here now. God knows how I'll cope when they are gone.

Speaking of my folks, my dad has to have his 4-year cancer blood test check up this week. I hope to God that this is all OK. He's gone back though so quickly lately, its been a shock to see him having to hobble around with a walking stick whenever he leaves the house, and quite often around the house now too.

My parents are quite depressed and frustrated too, and I feel totally responsible for that. I wish I could change things so that we could all be happy again but I just dont know what to do anymore. Im totally lost. Not only is there no longer no light at the end of the tunnel, but there isnt even a tunnel. Im just floating in blackness unsure where to go or what to do. Life stinks. The pain in thumping away inside me as I type. I have the TENS machine on for what good its doing me.

I also lost one of my primary sources of computing entertainment this week. The regulars amongst you will know that Im a fan of online role playing games, and I spend my PC gaming time between World of Warcraft and Star Wars Galaxies. Well, this week SWG creators, Sony Online Entertainment, launched a radical overhaul of the game (the second in a year - in a desperate attempt to attract new gamers), but the truth is that the changes are terrible. They have made my character that Ive spent two whole years creating and working on totally and utterly useless. He is now as "strong" at a Level 80 Jedi combat level as a level 15 Womp Rat! I got my ass handed to me on a plate by two fricking newbies the other day! So much for Jedi being all powerful. It took me two years almost to grind my way thru the Jedi profession - you cant just jump straight into it, you had to earn the right to be a jedi, and then grind your way thru that profession. But now, SOE, in their infinite wisdom have deemed that anyone can be a jedi fromd day one. So before whereas jedi used to be mystical characters in the game, and quite rare, nearly all characters are bloody jedi!

On top of this, the NGE (New gaming enhancements - as SOE are calling the upgrade) was announced a little over a month ago, three days after the last expansion pack for the game came out. Everyone rushed n bought it and three days later the content became null n void by that annoucement of the NGE as it cancelled out the benefits of it, most of which were Jedi related. SOE are now offering refungs for that expansion pack. Not only this though, the actual NGE only spent 2 WEEKS in testing. I test my websites longer than that!!!! Never mind a massive game project the size of SWG! So, the game is full of bugs. People have been forced from having a choice of 30+ profession to just 9 "iconic" professions. So anyone who was one of the lost professions have had to "respec". When you respec though you lose all your character experience and start at square one. Its an insult to the veterans of the game and there is hell on in the forums at SWG's website.

Gamers - include myself - are cancelling their accounts. I had two accounts both of which have been cancelled. Players are leaving in their thousands. Its a tragedy. My guild that I was part of GDF has all but folded, theres no one in it now, and so Ive lost contact with most of my friends in SWG. Its heartbreaking.

I cannot see SWG lasting to this time next year. In fact theres rumours abound that George Lucas has given SOE til February to bring the game into line with his vision and get player numbers up or he's pulling the plug. To be honest thats the best thing that could happen, then Lucas could work on SWG 2 and bring that game back to its roots with updated graphics and gameplay because with SWG being nearly 3 years old it looks very dated now compared to the likes of World of Warcraft.

So, anyways, I lost a lot of friends this week with that. I sent out a guild mail giving my email address but I think a lot have left already so very few will receive it. :o(

Fuck the pain is exploding i have to go, sorryt to run .

J.
Pain screaming
Depression depressing

Posted by Jason at 10:01 AM | Comments (5)

November 07, 2005

Another week gone

Wow, has it really been a week since I last filled in an entry for this journal? I guess so! I dont know where the time has gone, it only seems like yesterday since I last entered something into this tome.

Its not as if its been an action packed where where my feet havent touched the ground. In fact if anything its the opposite. Its been a boring week where my feet rarely left the floor! Its been a difficult week healthwise, the pain problems have been sporadically causing me periods of severe discomfort. Also more worrying is the fact that I had some very bad body jerks which meant I ended up spending some evenings laying on the bed trying to keep things at bay.

When I have been on the computer I've been doing some more stuff on the new website Im working on. Ive also set up a gallery for the ostomy sites users to display their photos in themselves instead of waiting for admins to do it for them, and Ive been killing a bit of stuff in World of Warcraft... lvl42 now! And well over halfway to the 110000 xp I need to reach Lvl 43.

The depression has been in swings and roundabouts all week. Sometimes Im feeling bright enough, and then when the pain comes in the depression rolls over me like a storm just waiting to happen. On thursday this week Im meant to be going to see the depression people. It could be a very difficult appt as its the first time i'll have seen them since the major downer of September time when I got low enough to not only consider suicide but to write out a list of pros and cons as to why I should or should not do it. It wont be easy to talk to them about that. Chances are I'll come out more depressed than I go in, but I guess they need to know all this stuff. :/

Anyways, Im going to leave this here for now. LIke I said theres been so little happening around here that I havent got a lot to talk about at the moment. Maybe in the next few days I'll have more to say. You lucky things you(!)

Bye now,

J.
Pain: 4/10
Depression: 4/10

Posted by Jason at 06:15 PM | Comments (4)